And Then Came The Storm!!

It was peaceful for a few days and I am very thankful for it, but as always it was only the calm before the storm. As I sit here and pour my thoughts onto the computer screen (in the old days it would have been onto paper) it occurs to me that I must sound like a horrible mother. I write about my children and sometimes I realize that there is a lot of anger in my remarks, but there is also much hurt and much despair.

Last night was another round of drama; but, before I go into last night I must give a little background on my daughter's relationship with each other and Friday's episode. The relationship between my daughters has always been strained! My oldest was three when her sister was born. I'm not sure if the resentment started then or if it was something that grew over the years. As they grew up, the oldest had trouble with school work, the youngest excelled (elementary school), the oldest was treated harsely by her father, the youngest seemed to be daddy's little girl, the youngest sang in public, the oldest couldn't carry a tune, and so it has gone on and on like this for years. As they became teenagers and young adults they have turned the drugs, alcohol and worthless men to relieve their demons. So Friday's meltdown was between my two daughters!

More background: I believe I've mentioned in previous post that my youngest daughter is living in our home with her three children and the boyfriend has also been staying with us. Let me explain how this came about and then I will go into the fight between my daughters. Once upon....just joking, it was only 5 years ago that my daughter was at the end of another bad relationship and she moved back in with us. At the time we lived in a 16 X 80 mobile home. So my husband and I decided to purchase a doublewide (manufactured home) and we would sell the older home to our daughter. She had a job and recieved child support from two of her children's fathers, our deal was if she went to college (unwed mother, she could get grants) she could live there for free, if whe wasn't in school we expected her to pay notes...also, if she moved a man into her home that man would have to pay rent. So in 5 years she went through 2 relationships and between the 2 we were paid for the mobile home. So she lives in a paid for home, only has utilities and lot rent. However, once she met her current boyfriend 3 years ago, life has been going downhill for her.

Before she met "him" she had one semester of school behind her (had a 4.0) and was in her second semester. She wasn't happy in her current relationship when she met up with "him". So the boyfriend was kicked out and she moved this one in. This guy doesn't work, he receives a little money from disability. So, during the time they are together, neither one will work for any time period at all. They live off her decreasing child support (only one of the father's is now paying) and his disbility. So a few months ago she feels that he had an affair, she eventually gets him to admit it, kicks him out and begins a month ordeal of staying high from "ice"...So in the long run she comes to a point where she can no longer pay her utilities and asked to move in with us until she can find a job and get on her feet. When her electric is turned off, I go to get her...and she looked horrible. I asked if she was on drugs and she admitted everything. At that point, I wanted to help her if I could. I was terrified that she wouldn't be able to kick this habit, but I still opened my door for her and the grandkids.

So she moves in and there were a few turmultuous days with her still on drugs, but eventually she stopped doing those after a few weeks. But during this time, she is constantly letting the boyfriend, who she now is starting to believe slept with 3 or 4 people...come back around and they are constantly fighting. When she  thinks he slept with someone, she badgers him until he eventually admits to it.. Truthfully I don't think the boy could get that many women to sleep with him, even if they were sluts! I mean he isn't anything special...So she has now accused him of sleeping with her sister and he has admitted to it, not once but off and on for the past 3 years!! So, because he admits to all this, she can forgive him (except that she is forever flying into rages). Oh, I forgot to mention that he did not move in with her at the onset, but a few weeks ago he fell off of a roof and broke his foot. At the time he was in an argument with his brother who he had been staying with so my hubby felt sorry for him and let him start staying in our home with her.

So with background somewhat complete, let me get onto last Friday. My youngest believes in getting even, so it seems that she is making the boyfriend tell people what he did (like the husbands and boyfriends of the people she is accusing him of sleeping with). This would include her sister's boyfriend. It appears that she was texting my oldest daughters boyfriend on Thursday night, the oldest daughter texted her the next morning which was on Friday asking why, which started and all out war between the two.  So, I have my oldest daughter calling me telig me that m youngest daughter needs help, she is bawling, scared to stay at home because she is afraid her sister will show up there.  Now in the midst of all this I have been calling gotten the phone number of a mental health clincic and I send the info by text to my youngest daughter who comes unglued...Long story short, I call my hubby and I send him to deal with my daughter at home. I refuse to deal with her.

So that was Friday. Saturday and Sunday were somewhat peaceful.  Then on Monday, my oldest daughter who happens to have a few boxes of her belongings at my house wants them right then!! I put them in my car and tell her that I will get them to her. So Tuesday evening rolls around, I'm tired, I don't want to go anywhere after work. So that afternoon the phone starts ringing and she wants to come get her stuff now. She needs it now...needless to say she has been drinking, I try telling her I will bring it to her on Thursday while she is at work or she can come then because her sister won't be at the house, and ofcourse she keeps trying to manipulate me into her coming over or me bringing it to her. I'm getting frustrating and, you guess it, I hand the phone off to my hubby! So he is dealing with her when the other one comes through the kitchen overhears the conversations. She ask who it is and I tell her and she proceeds to start loudly voicing her opinions of her sister. Hubby is fed up, he tells off the one on the phone and then precedes to go deal with the angry one.

So, we have told her that crippled boyfriend must be gone by Tuesday...let's see what happens!

Two and a half days of calm

The weekend has been a calm one. No emothional outburst since Friday morning! My poor hubby, everytime my daughter has a meltdown I call him to deal with her. He has a way of staying calm and addressing the issues at hand. Me, I get mad and aggravated, I feel helpless and I start behaving like her!!! I thank my lucky stars for him every day!

My daughter has been to church three Sundays in a row. I am not one who likes organized religion; however, if organized religion helps my daughter mellow out and be a nicer, sweeter, human being...I'm all for it! Today's sermon seemed to be a good one for her, it dealt with being angry at people and how you should treat people..I told her I will give her my Dad's bible if she continues to go to church! Who knows, maybe she will start singing again...I'd even go to church to see that!

Is She or Isn't She

Did I mention in my previous post that I believe my daughter is bipolar or has some  other mental disorder. If not, she is one of the biggest BIOTCHES there is!!! Take yesterday for example...the morning started off well enough. She took her daughters to school, took her son and boyfriend to their respective doctors appointments. She came back home in a good mood, Elijah's cast was removed and she had taken him back to school. She and her boyfriend leave to go to the pharmacy; about 30 minutes later she is in my driveway yelling, cursing at the top of her lungs!! So, needless to say I'm fuming, I open the door and I begin to shout (I shout, not yell or scream) that if she doesn't stop I'm going to call the police and they can just haul them both off! Of course, she screams back something and I go back in the house. Mission accomplished, it does quiet down outside, she may be beating the crap out of him, but at least I'm not having to listen to it!

In the meantime I call my poor husband and whine to him! Poor guy, she is driving me crazy and in turn I'm probably driving him insane!


Yesterday was example #1 of massive mood swing! Today we had example #2...

This morning I awoke thinking about how bad it sucks that I've been off all week, earlier due to sinus infection or a head cold...and today and tomorrow were scheduled. And I'm really aggravated that instead of spending my days in solitude I have Ms. Lunatic and Mr. Worthless in my home. So as I said, I'm a little on the teed off side of life when I log onto facebook to see that my daughter has posted something to her page informing the world (or at least her world on facebook which includes some of my family and friends) that so and so had a threesome at such and such trailer park!!! I calmly post asking her to delete any of my friends and family because she is definitely not behaving any better than the people she writes about. After a while when I don't receive a response, I march myself to the door of her room and inform her that what she has done could be against the law (maybe I'm over embellishing) but that it is none the less a form of bullying or harrassment. Also, I don't want my normal decent friends and family reading that crap and she needs to delete them.

So now, I'm in the peace and quiet of Barnes and Nobles, enjoying my day away from the day to day ignornance that goes on in my home.

So until the next bizzare or stupid incident, hope you have a good day...I feel better now!!

Why Blog

I'm a beginning blogger. It's my attempt at holding on to my sanity while watching my children spiral uncontrollably downward! Some days I get so frustrated at their behavior and I desperately need an outlet. So, maybe my outlet can be your entertainment! So let me tell you a little about myself!


I am a 52 year old grandmother, born and reared in the Louisiana. I was the only child of an alcoholic and a mother who had her own demons. She grew up bitter and insecure, which made for a very angry young woman. My parents liked to go out on Friday and/or Saturday nights, so on the weekends they would go dancing at the local bars leaving me with various relatives. Then after partying they would come home and fight for hours...so as a teen, I was eager to grow up and be on my own.

At 16 I married my high school sweetheart. I literally went from asking mom and dad to asking my husband. The marriage was abusive, and it took me almost ten years and two kids before I escaped from it. By the age of 25 I had met my current husband, who should be nominated for sainthood in the fact that he has remained by my side throught the turmoil that my family has put us through over the years.

First it was my crazy ex husband, then as my daughters grew up and it became even crazier. My oldest had her first child at 15, she and his father were in jail for dealing drugs by the time she was 20. While in jail my husband and I, along with my ex husband took care of my grandson...after 2 1/2 years in jail she came home. Got involved with another low life, had two children by him, and along the way became an alcoholic.

My youngest daughter was a wonderful child with a sweet disposition. Along the way that child was lost and she begame an angry, rebellous teenager. Over the years she has used drugs, was pregnant at 17, has had 3 children by 3 different men, She cannot stay in a relationship over 2 years and all the relationships have involved domestic abuse with her most likely being he aggressor in most of them...

So this will be what I blog about. The past and the present, whichever happens to be on my mind. Thanks for listening!